It wasn't my sister who was the vile fork-wielding enemy--it was my father. Nooo, he couldn't be satisfied with the sweetest, stickiest, goopiest cake ever covered in Cool-Whip and Heath Bar bits... no, he had to go and steal MY PIE. Both of them.

He nearly succeeded, too. It came down to the final trade of Miller Chocolate Cake for the last piece of Pumpkin Pie, and it was a bittersweet trade...I wanted 'em both. I still don't understand how he could eat that monstrosity of a cake and follow it up with the delicate flavors of a pumpkin pie. I doubt I ever will.

So what did I do as soon as I got back to my house? Made a humungo-jumbo apple pie. Which is currently staring at me, taunting me and my pride. I can resist...

::resistance is futile::

Currently, Pie, 2. MM, 0. Rematch tonight.

~~~~~

The snow's back, and so's my inability to buy a frellin' hat. "How hard is it," you ask, "to go to a store and buy one?" Well, basically,

DAMN HARD.

I seem to have a desire to find both a warm and stylish hat to keep my ears from freezing off, but it gets trampled by my desire to be indoors and not taking detours home thru stores and shops selling aforementioned gear. (I'd really like new gloves too, but let's start with one thing first)

Thus, my naked head, my cold fingers, and my disgust. I searched online--I found cute hats, but they all had things wrong with them (to me). For example: hats with bells, pom-poms, or tassels must NOT be on my head. I don't want things waving about as I walk to the train at an ungodly hour every morning. You know those cute hats that little kids get to wear, out of fun materials and patterns? With the pointy tops?

Put one on an adult head and take a poll amongst friends. You will not be 'cute', but laughter will ensue and follow you everywhere, along with your new nickname(s). You don't believe me? Try it.

And as to other types of hats, am I the only person around who has this issue or are people silent on the topic of static? Static is the bane of my winter existance and my search for the perfect hat. All the good hats stay on your head because they're tight, but they're out of materials that build static like I shop a sale at Target: fast, purposeful, and ruthless. Nice hair is a joke in these months of hats and hoods, but of course it's a joke in the summer due to (bike)helmet hair or sweating-on-the-El hair...so why do I even bother? And it's not like I'm trying for fancy-schmancy hair, either...just something nice that looks like I'm approaching adult-status. So, to deny static, the hats can't be fleece or wool, the two warmest substances ever--unless they're lined, which brings up other problems.

Hats. Bah.

~~~~~